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Loud Spanish music, passionate albiet drunkenly sloppy kisses in the center of the crowd. I guess I expected to feel a little more, of I don’t know how exactly I learned these.

Him chasing me out into the warm Sevillian night to get my number. I went home thinking my semester abroad in Spain couldn’t get any better. I had sex ed in my 6th grade public school, but that was mostly about puberty.

But sex is only a small part of who we are as sexual beings. Sexuality is much more than body parts and sex (though it includes these things, too). Sexuality includes our gender identity (the core sense that we are female, male, both, neither, or somewhere in between). Sexuality includes gender role (the idea of how we should behave because of our gender identity). Sexuality includes our sexual orientation (heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, asexual, or other identities). A person with poor body image may not think they deserve a good partner, and so they may be willing to settle for someone who will not respect them or who may even abuse them. Sexuality includes our sexual experiences, thoughts, ideas, and fantasies. Sexuality includes the way in which the media, family, friends, religion, age, life goals, and our self-esteem shape our sexual selves. Sexuality includes how we experience intimacy, touch, love, compassion, joy, and sorrow. We like this quote: “Sexuality is expressed in the way we speak, smile, stand, sit, dress, dance, laugh, and cry.” In short, sexuality is an integral part of who we are, what we believe, what we feel, and how we respond to others.

Even people who are not having sex are sexual beings. Which means that whether you like it or not and whether you say anything or not, you will have a strong influence on the sexuality of your children.

The girl who could actually do it should win an award for idiot of the century.” ― “The villains were always ugly in books and movies. Because if they were attractive—if their looks matched their charm and their cunning—they wouldn't only be dangerous. Hence, too dense to figure out why I'm staring at his ass.” ― “Physical attraction that strong is addictive.

And so there’s another word that you should know and use too. Here are some of the things that are included when we talk about sexuality: Do you think your child has the same definition? People tend to use the word “sex” very differently or arbitrarily – what sex is or means to one person can be radically different than what it is or means to someone else.

We call that “body image,” and poor body image can have a profound effect on our ability to have healthy relationships.

In fact, today, desire differences are a leading reasons why couples consult sex therapists. Perhaps you've heard the old joke: What's foreplay to a man married for 10 years? There are plausible biological reasons why, in general, men would want more sex than women.

When desire differences emerge, who wants sex more? Male sex hormones (testosterone in men and a slightly different hormone in women) fuel libido in both genders, and men have much higher levels.

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