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"Traditionally, women were expected to follow the man’s lead, zero in on his topics, ask questions, and draw him out.This only reinforced the inequality of the relationship; his thoughts and ideas were the center of the attachment from the beginning while she pretended to be interested, and put her life in the background," says Dr. "This is what we now call 'male entitlement,' and we ought to be seeking 'mutual entitlement' on our dates," she says."Mutual entitlement means both men and women share the same rights to assert, control, limit, and set boundaries.
Of course, you'll want to follow the venue's dress code, but if you don't feel like your best self in a bodycon dress and stiletto booties, then wear whatever brings out your most important asset—your smile. "If these things are important to you, however, you should tell your prospective partner," says Dr. "You may just find that they prefer to show chivalry in other ways you haven't considered."Admittedly, first date conversations can be awkward.Of course, there are studies that suggest acting shy or playing coy makes you more attractive—but it's risky.What if holding out on your affection or not being honest about the way you feel makes the person want to give up the chase? "This used to be tactic used to make a woman feel more in control," says licensed psychologist Dr. "It was taught as a way to allow the 'pursuer' to do all of the work to initiate and maintain the relationship.But if they're cool with you having dinner with someone they shared one cocktail with, then swipe right.First dates are super exciting and can leave people with that exhilarating feeling of butterflies in the stomach and stars in the eyes.